The Cullen Clinic
by TopazHeart
Summary: A look into the day to day runnings of The Cullen Clinic. Rated T due to some strong language.
1. Rosalie Hale

A/N: The inspiration came from my job, co-workers and some of the records I see during the week. It's meant to be funny. If it falls short of the mark let me know. The characters are mostly SMeyers. The story is mine. No copyright infringement is intended. The story hasn't been beta'd so I ask for forgiveness for any grammatical errors. I will get around to having it beta'd though. :)

The Cullen Clinic

"Good morning, Cullen Clinic. How may we serve you today?"

I walked up to the perky brunette at the desk. She held her finger up to me indicating that she would be with me in a moment. I smiled and nodded in silent understanding.

"Yes. Okay. I am setting your son up with an emergency appointment with our orthopedic surgeon Dr. McCarty. Yes…mmm hmm. We can fit you in at 3pm. Yes, yes. It would actually be very helpful if you have those x-rays. Yes, Mrs. Anderson. Alright, see you then."

The brunette hung up from her call and looked at me when the phone rang again. She rolled her eyes and made that 'I'm sorry' face. You know the one. She made her mouth go down on one side and her eyes went all big at the same time. She would have made the 'sssss' noise except the phone was already to her ear.

"Good morning. Thank you for calling the Cullen Clinic, please hold." She pressed a button and looked at me. "I am so sorry! I'm Jessica, how may I help you?"

"Hi, I'm Rosalie Hale, I'm here to see Dr. Carlisle Cullen on behalf of Newton Pharmaceuticals?"

"Oh, yeah yeah. He told me to keep an eye out. Wow, you're a knock out. I so hate you right now. Are those your tits? They can't be real. Did you go to Dr. Cheney? He does such good work and your boobs look absolutely fabulous I wish my boobs looked that fabulous."

_What. The. Hell? This chick is nuts_' I tried to school my facial features into a neutral expression but really I knew it wasn't working and seeing as how she didn't seem to notice I stopped caring and just looked at her like she was stupid.

"Um, Jessica, was it? You realize you have someone holding on the phone right?"

"Oh shit! Ooops!" She looked around quickly before putting her hand up to her mouth and speaking behind it, "we're not supposed to use bad language. I could get written up for that and I so do not need another write up." She said before straightening her spine and giving me the 'just one moment' finger again.

_I bet I could break that finger. _I thought better of it though. If I could land a good deal with Dr. Cullen it would be a big deal for me and for my company.

"Hi. Hello, so sorry for the wait. Thank you for calling the Cullen Clinic, how may direct your call? Oh, hiiiiii Esme! It's so good to hear from you. How are you? Um, actually there's someone to see him from the pharmaceutical company. Just between you and me," she tried to whisper, "the rep is a total knock out. Big boobs and curvy, but you know you have nothing to feel threatened about. Carlisle doesn't go for that kind of thing. I mean, you know, he married you." Jessica was screwing her face into a grimace.

_OUCH! How the fuck does this chick have a job?_

"Oh, um, um okay. Yeah, I can transfer you, but she's like right here. Sure, yeah. No prob Esme." Jessica pressed a couple of buttons and then spoke into the receiver again. "Carlisle, the pharmaceutical rep is here and Esme is on the line. I told her someone was here to see you but she really insisted…. Um, oh yeah okay." Jessica hung up the phone and shrugged.

"I don't know what the fuck that was about. She said rolling her eyes and shook her head while tapping something into the computer." She looked up from the screen, finally remembering I was standing at her desk or maybe she didn't remember… who knows."

"Oh, Roxie, right?" I cocked my right eyebrow up. Professional? No. Instinctual? Yes.

"Yeah, that's right Jamie." She looked slightly taken aback at my response.

"Uhhhh." She sat there for a moment with her mouth hanging open.

I had the distinct impression she found herself making that face-a lot, especially with the opposite sex… while on her knees.

It took her a moment but she finally closed her mouth and promptly scrunched her nose at me. I smirked. Someone should really tell her she's not cute enough to make that facial expression. She muttered something under her breath while rolling her neck.

"What was that honey," I asked lowering my face down towards her desk giving her my best 'fuck with me if you want to and see what happens face.' She blinked rapidly for a moment and straightened her spine again, though to be honest, I think I scared her. _Good. Stupid wench._

" I said, Dr. Cullen will be with you in a moment. If you'd like to wait, you may have a seat. There." She pointed to a section of chairs across from her desk.

"Thank you, Jenny." I couldn't help the smirk I felt on my face which grew into the biggest smile when I saw her face. She was pissed. I started chuckling and had to get myself together when a handsome doctor came out from the back.

"Good morning," he smiled as he headed toward me with his hand extended.

"Good morning," I stood and met him halfway with a smile of my own. "I'm Rosalie Hale."

"Ms. Hale, it's a pleasure. My name is Carlisle Cullen." I detected a slight English accent. It was nice. If you weren't at ease by Dr. Cullen's calm presence then his soothing voice definitely knocked down any barriers in your mind.

"The pleasure is mine Dr. Cullen. I look forward to discussing some changes that we have made to our products. We have some new products but of course there are those that we know work and work well and though we know people are interested in using generic formulas when possible some of these newer products as you know won't be available in generic form for quite some time; however, I do have plenty of samples and even a few coupons for you to give to some of your patients. We understand this is a tough time in the economy and we want our customers who are your patients to be able to get the pharmaceutical therapy that is best for them… not second best."

Dr. Cullen chuckled, "breathe, Ms. Hale. Please, join me in my office." Dr. Cullen extended his hand in front of him and we walked side by side back behind Jessica's desk down a well decorated corridor.

"So, Ms. Hale. I do want to apologize for keeping you waiting. I had a very important phone call from a very important client…"

"Dr. Cullen, let me tell you, at the risk of sounding unprofessional. I would want my husband to take my calls, _especially if a) I think it's important or b) the receptionist starts making slightly inappropriate comments or whatever she was doing…"_

"Inappropriate comments?" He asked raising both of his eyebrows.

"Um, yes, well… let's just say… " I grew quiet for a moment. "Oh fuck it," I whisper-shouted. "That little twit at your front desk basically told your wife I was hot but she didn't have anything to worry about because that wasn't your taste preference because you married her. I'm paraphrasing of course."

He was shocked and turned his head from side to side as his face got redder and redder. "She said whaaat?" Wow, I think his accent just got like ten times thicker.

"Yeah, call your wife. Please. I would love to apologize to her just for being there when it happened."

Dr. Cullen picked up his cell phone, pressed two buttons and held his phone up to his ear. "Darling, can you talk?"

He paused obviously listening. "Should I call you later? No, oh, alright. I'll wait love."

He let out a heavy sigh and looked up at me. He tried to smile but his heart wasn't in it. I started to rise but he stopped me. "Ms. Hale, please stay, this will only take a moment. I apologize this is not very professional I know…"

"Yes darling, I'm here. Ms. Hale the pharmaceutical representative is here in my office and she just relayed something rather disturbing to me. Darling, when you called earlier, was Jessica inappropriate with you? Did she say anything…"

Dr. Cullen got red all over again. Yikes, his blood pressure is probably through the roof.

"That. Little. Tart." I smirked and tried to cover it up, unsuccessfully.

Dr. Cullen blushed, at least I think he blushed. He was still a little red from what I presume was Esme relaying her side of this morning conversation.

"Darling, why didn't you tell me. You know I would have fired her. Well, know I don't have another receptionist but we could make do until I found someone. Her manner is abhorrent and she insulted you my darling girl. I cannot have that."

Now I was blushing, this conversation is so not for my ears.

Dr. Cullen noticed my pinkening cheeks. "Oh, dear girl, I apologize. Mae, I should really call you back. I've had Ms. Hale in here this entire time."

"Dr. Cullen, may I?" I asked reaching for his phone.

"Mae dear, Ms. Hale would like to speak with you." He smiled, "just a moment then dear." Dr. Cullen smiled at me and extended his hand with the cell phone. I took it and pressed it to my ear.

"Mrs. Cullen?"

"Yes," a kind voice answered. "Mrs. Cullen I want to apologize if I overstepped any boundaries by relaying the conversation from earlier. I meant no disrespect to you but I did not appreciate Jessica's behavior and I really felt like something needed to be said."

"Thank you Ms. Hale."

"Please, call me Rosalie."

"Thank you Rosalie, please call me Esme." I could hear the smile in her voice.

"Will do, Mrs…uh, sorry. Esme" I laughed at myself, "alright then I'm going to turn you back over to your husband now. I need to skidaddle or I'll be late for my next appointment."

"Oh, of course dear. Thank you again."

"My pleasure, Esme."

I reached across Dr. Cullen's desk and handed his phone to him. "Dr. Cullen."

"Carlisle," he smiled at me as he accepted his phone.

"Carlisle." I nodded my head toward him as I stood.

"Rosalie?"

"Yes?"

"Don't forget those samples and coupons and I'd love some new pens if you have any," he smirked.

I couldn't help the big stupid smile that stretched across my face. I was so excited I was speechless for a moment.

"Of course, well, I don't have a full complement for you today but I can return in a couple of days. For now though, I do have these samples. This set is for our most popular allergy medications and this one," I said reaching for another box, "this is the new beta blocker we've developed, which really is the same as the old one except the patent is about to run out and then there will be a generic available so yeah. I kind of just shot myself with that one but, my dad went through a rough patch without insurance a couple of times so I get it. Anyway. This one is the new statin, it actually is new. We're competing with Lipitor." I said all of that in such a rush I made myself lightheaded.

I looked up and saw Dr. Cullen suppressing a laugh.

"Sorry, I got excited, " I blushed.

"Clearly, but I completely understand. I'll see you in a couple of days. Oh… I'll tell her dear. Esme says thank you again."

I smiled a grin that rivaled the Cheshire Cat's and told Carlisle I would see myself out. Today started off with an idiot but slowly got better. Fuck yeah! That's the kind of result I like!

A/N:

1) ALIS is almost done. I have anywhere from one to four chapters left. I had an outline that has mysteriously disappeared, which means it's in my office or inserted in a journal somewhere (yes I still use pen and paper from time to time).

2) This is just a little something I've been playing with doing for a bit. I don't know if it's just a one shot or a multi-chaptered story. We'll see what happens.

3) Leave a review please.

Thanks for reading!


	2. Esme Cullen

A/N: Smeyer's characters where used in this little doodad. No copyright infringement intended. I hope you enjoy!

The Cullen Clinic

I woke up early today and felt a bit like Cinderella or Snow White when they were singing with the little birdies. Today was the day that Jessica was getting fired.

Now, normally I would not take satisfaction in the misfortune of another but if I were ever to call a woman an unpleasant name, that woman would be Jessica.

I cannot believe how that little _heifer_ called me _unattractive _and _flat chested_. I will have her know that I have perfectly natural b-cups and Carlisle says more than a handful is too much. "Humph, _little bitch_."

I know all that junk she said was just that… junk, but it doesn't mean it doesn't hurt to hear it.

I did like that Rosalie Hale though, she sounded nice. I'm glad I told Carlisle to work with her. Just to hear her rambling while she was in his office was so cute! "Heeheehee. I hope she stops by the office today. I want to meet her. Plus, I kind of want her to be there when Jessica is sacked." I muttered the last part to myself… technically; I said it all to myself. See as how there was no one else at the house.

"Ooooh it's already after ten, I gotta go or I'm going to miss it."

10:43am

I waltzed into Carlisle's office around 10:45am as happy as a nun at prayer time. …_and there she is_.

"Good morning, Jessica. How are you today?" I gave her the biggest smile I could and I meant it.

"Hiiiiii Esme! How are you?"

"I am wonderful, Jessica. Is Carlisle with a patient?"

"Ummmmm, I don't know. Let me see. No, no patient but… Rosalie Hale is due in at 11 for their appointment today. I don't know why she had to come in again so soon. I mean she was just here like two days ago and like seriously do they really need to talk that often. The previous pharm rep only came in once in a blue moon but of course he wasn't nearly as cute as she as. So, I'm kinda glad he didn't come in more often. Not that I like girls or anything or that I'm against that you know if that's your thing it's just not my thing. You know except for that one time in high school and well and in nursing school but that's it. You know?"

_I do believe I've just lost a couple hundred brain cells. Thank you Jessica for making me dumber. Yikes, I'm going to have to go watch the Discovery Channel or something. Hmmm, maybe HGTV counts. I'll watch Design to Sell or Color Splash. _

"…but like I was saying, he's not into girls like that anyway. I mean if Carlisle really wanted curvaceous I'd have bagged him a while ago you know but he's really into you and never even looked my way. I never tried any thing _of course_ well, except Dr. Masen but he like ran in the other direction or something. It was kind of odd like he knew what I was thinking…"

"Jessica, I'm going to go back and wait for Carlisle in his office, okay? Thank you." Wow that was ten minutes of my life I can't ever get back." I shook my head to rid it of Jessica's inanity _or is it insanity_? Either way, I need a sudoku and some ginseng to increase my brain power.

I sat in Carlisle's office behind his desk. He won't mind.

"Carlisle? Oh, hi Esme, I didn't know you were here."

"Hi Edward dear, how are you?" I need to find him a nice girl. He's too sweet to be single.

"I'm good. Uh oh, you have that look in your eye again."

"What look?"

"The 'you want to set me up look.' No thanks Esme. When the time is right and the right woman comes along. I'll know it. I promise."

"If you say so Edward, but I fully intend to keep my eye open for some beautiful, intelligent girl to sweep you off your feet."

Edward laughed, "Alright Esme but if she can't cook like my mom, there's no point in her even trying. Hey, I have a patient due in five minutes. When you see Carlisle, please tell him I need to speak to him about a consult."

"Will do, Edward." Edward exited the office and headed toward reception, presumably to look for his patient.

"Hmmm, I wonder if Rosalie is single. Maybe she and Edward…"

"Maybe she and Edward what dear," I hadn't heard Carlisle enter his office.

"I was just wondering if they would get along, that's all," I pouted. Carlisle walked over to me sitting at his desk and kissed me.

"Don't pout dear, but you know how he feels about being set up."

"But Carl, dear."

"Shhhh. Hush, Mae, this is where I still a kiss," I giggled like a little school girl.

"You can't still what's already yours, sweetie."

"Ahem." Carlisle and I pulled apart to see Emmett in the doorway. "Sorry to interrupt folks. Carlisle, Eddie's looking for you and there's a hot blonde woman in the lobby from Newton Pharmaceutical. Can you put in a good word for me, Pimp Daddy C?"

"Pimp Daddy C," I inquired, looking from Carlisle to Emmett.

"Yeah, I'm Big Mac. He's Pimp Daddy C!"

"So who's Edward," I looked between the two.

"We don't know yet. Nothing seems to stick to him."

"Nothing sticks to whom?" Edward stopped on his way presumably to an exam room.

"No one," Emmett said and walked away. Edward looked perplexed by Emmett's retreat, shrugged his shoulders and continued down the hall.

I looked at Carlisle, he looked at me and we laughed.

Knock. Knock. Knock.

"Goodness this _is_ Grand Central Station isn't it," I asked Carlisle.

"Sorry to interrupt folks but I have that paperwork you requested for Jessica Stanley, Carlisle."

"Come in Alice." The little elfin princess, pointy ears and all, pranced into Carlisle's office.

"Hi Esme! How's it going? Are you sticking around for lunch, if so and if you don't have plans maybe we could go shopping. Macy's is having a shoe sale event. I am SO EXCITED! I love shoe shopping, shoes are the best and shopping is the best and when you combine that…nirvana." Alice signed deeply holding her heart.

I love the girl but sometimes I swear she's a couple sandwiches shy of a picnic basket.

"I have plans with Carl today Alice, but maybe another time?"

"Sure, Esme, no biggie. Anyway, here you go Caarrrlll." Alice laughed at the shortening of Carlisle's name and headed out of his office. "Oh, Carlisle if you're not comfortable dismissing Ms. Stanley, please let me know and I'll take care of it."

And that is why we hired Alice. She might be a nut job but she's our efficient little nut job.

A/N: I like writing this bit of dribble. It makes me smile. J

Review please!


	3. M Alice Brandon Whitlock no hyphen

A/N: I am having so much fun being so dang stupid with this story. The characters are mostly SMeyers. No copyright infringement intended.

The Cullen Clinic

"Wake up - sleepy head, rub your eyes, get out of up, the Wicked Witch is dead. She's gone where the goblins go,Below - below - below. Yo-ho, let's open up and sing and ring the bells Dong' the merry-oh, sing it high, sing it low. "

"Mary Alice?"

I was so distracted, I didn't realize I was about to bump into my husband. "Oh, so sorry dear. I was a little wrapped up in my thoughts."

"Mmmhmm. You might want to tone that down. I don't think the whole office is supposed to know when someone is being let go," Jasper kissed my forehead and proceeded down the far right corridor where most of the exam rooms where.

So, yeah I was being a little unprofessional strolling back toward my office humming that musical classic 'Ding Dong the Witch is Dead.' Oh, sue me. What's the little twerp going to do? She's been written up more times than well, I don't know what she's been written up more times than but if I come up with a good analogy I'll let ya know.

I am not normally quite this unprofessional, well… okay that's not really true. I am wholly inappropriate with my husband when we're in his office which is on the back wall and well away from the rest of the staff, except for Edward. Poor thing has heard us more than once but he never says anything just shakes his head. We smile, he rolls his eyes. See that's why I love our Eddie, he's not a hater and definitely appreciates the game. We know we're being too loud when all of a sudden we hear Bach's concerto or Puccini's La Boheme or Turandot. Our Eddie definitely loves his classics.

I really want to find him a girl but it's hard to find a woman our age who is into the classical music but doesn't have a stick up her ass. Eddie is very much a gentleman: proper and appropriate and hate's being called Eddie, for that matter. I think I'm the only one that's gets away with it without getting that 'fuck you' brow of his, not that he would ever say fuck you.

I sighed audibly.

"What's wrong Alice?" I looked up to see Eddie in my doorway and smiled.

"Nothing at all. I was actually just thinking about you. We need to find you a girl."

"Oh no, not you too, Al," he pinched his nose and shook his head.

"What do you mean 'not you too?' Who else is trying to get you laid," I questioned.

"I caught Esme a little bit ago trying to set me up with, well… she was 'thinking about' setting me up with someone but please, please for all that is holy. Don't!"

"Aw, come on Edward if we find you a nice girl then you could double date with Jasper and I." I smiled hoping he'd see what a great idea that would be.

"No thanks Alice." Edward looked around and then whispered, "You and Jasper don't know how to keep your hands to yourself when you're here. There's no way in hell I'm going on a date and sitting across from you guys while you make kissy faces at each other throughout dinner."

"Pish posh, we are not that bad." I rolled my eyes at him.

"Yes you are," Edward said and walked away. What did I say about him not hating? Yeah, scratch that. I rolled my eyes at Edward's comment. I can't help it if Jasper finds me irresistible…

I continued gathering the rest of Jessica's paperwork; her final check, which included pay through tomorrow and a two weeks severance pay just because Carlisle isn't a dick. I wouldn't have given her crap, but hey, that's part of the reason people love him so much. He's generous, almost to a fault.

I started working on the job announcement that would be posted online after Jessica was let go. I didn't really want to put it up before she left. I'm not a total heel. Besides, I asked and Carlisle said no.

I mean, do you really think I give a crap about Jessica's feelings? She's hit on every single man here or batted her eyelashes trying to get their attention. Even Jasper was a target before we got married. Thankfully, she's left Carlisle alone but that doesn't stop her inappropriate comments to Esme. Can we say jealous? I wanted to tell her more than once 'they don't want you!' I doubt she'd believe me though. She can be a little dense.

Now, I know I have my eccentricities and I can be a little 'out there' but I am quite intelligent and I know who I can be stupid around and when I can be stupid and when to put my game face on. Jessica has no game face… no filter, no… nothing. Sometimes I swear I can hear the air blowing around between her ears.

Knock, knock.

I looked up to find Carlisle in my doorway with a group of people.

"Carlisle?"

"Alice, I wanted to introduce you to some of the representatives from Newton Pharmaceutical. This is Marshall Newton the president and founder of the company. Rosalie Hale, she stopped by the other day and this is…

"I'm Mike Newton, how's it going? We're looking forward to servicing you guys and insuring a great working relationship. At Newton Pharmaceutical we believe in a hands on approach…" I didn't hear whatever else he said I focused on Rosalie Hale's face and the rising barometer of red from her neck to her hairline.

Servicing us? Hands on? Eww. "Um, Mike is it," I asked moving around my desk to shake their hands. I fought the urge to roll my eyes and looked at Rosalie who smirked at me. I smirked back. "Mrs. Hale, it's a pleasure.

"It's Miss and you may call me Rosalie," she smiled broadly while surreptitiously nudging her head towards Mike and rolling her eyes. "I am actually the one who would coordinate with your office. Mike's father just thought it would be nice for him to tag along today, right Mike?"

"Oh, um, yeah, just tagging along," Mike said his face falling a little.

"Of course, we understand. But you've made such a great impression I'm not sure we'd trust anyone else to handle our account. Isn't that so, Carlisle?"

"Quite so Alice. Quite so" Carlisle said while trying to restrain his smirk.

"Mr. Newton."

"Mrs. Whitlock," he said jovially. "So, are you a doctor as well?"

"No, I have a Master's in Finance and Business Administration," I pointed to my diplomas on the wall. "I'm the human resources manager." Mr. Newton struck me as the type to stereotype depending on someone's job title or the letters behind their name.

He smiled. Not a friendly one-a calculating one. Mike was harmless enough but what he lacked his dad had in spades. If Rosalie doesn't watch her back he's going to try and give her new account to his son.

I know what Rosalie said to Carlisle about Jessica's behavior toward Esme. And, Esme is the last person you should disrespect around here. Rosalie unknowingly made a friend for life out of Carlisle. If he thinks Newton's going to fuck her over he will cut ties and take his business elsewhere and get her a better job with another company. Carlisle is not one to be trifled with…

"Alice, why don't you finish the tour for me. I have a patient I'm expecting and then we can take care of that other matter Rosalie, it was lovely to see you again. If you can, please stick around. If not, I'll see you next week. We still need to discuss those pharmaceuticals for our in office pharmacy."

"Of course, Carlisle. I actually cleared my morning so we could iron out the details. I apologize I wasn't expecting… well, no matter." Rosalie stopped herself from commenting on the Newton's intrusion into her sale.

"Well, let's finish this tour and when we're done Carlisle I'll take Rosalie back to your office unless you need it?" I turned waiting on his response.

"Alice, why don't you take her to the empty office next to Emmett in case she has some work she wants to attend to and that way if I need my office it's available and we don't have to play musical chairs."

"Of course, Carlisle." I took the Newton team around our space. It was quite impressive and because of the decorating talents of Mrs. Esme Cullen it was the model of what a medical facility should be both in aesthetics and function.

I also took our visitors around to meet my boys who I knew would all be in the break room at this moment refueling their coffee and tea mugs respectively. "These are Drs. Edward Masen specializing in general cardiology, interventional cardiology, non-invasive diagnostic imaging, echocardiography and nuclear stress testing; Emmett McCarty, specializing in general orthopedics for both adult and pediatric fractures and sports medicine; Jasper Whitlock, MD/PhD in Psychiatry and Behavioral Medicine and Benjamin Cheney, specializing in general surgery and plastic surgery. "

Hmmm, I never noticed that all the doctors here are men. Weird. I should bring that up to Carlisle. We were talking about bringing in a pediatrician and a gynecologist to be a more well rounded facility. I think if it comes down to equally qualified candidates we should consider bringing on a couple of women. Nothing like a little gender equalization.

Mr. Newton and Mike left shortly after they met the guys. I thought it was odd that they left without meeting our pharmacist but seeing as I didn't like them anyway- I wasn't going to stop them.

"Okay, Rosalie. We can either go to the empty office or we can go see Angela up front in the cage. It's up to you."

"The _cage_? Is there some bondage requirement to work with you guys," Rosalie laughed.

"Oh don't worry, we reserve the cage for those we've thoroughly broken in," I winked at her. "We'll start you out with handcuffs and feathers." I whispered as we walked to the pharmacy window to the right of the receptionist's desk. Angela laughed, I guess I didn't whisper as well as I thought. I blushed.

"Sorry Ang," my face was burning. I wasn't usually so… well, me in front of Angela. She was your classic good girl. She just giggled and rolled her eyes.

"I am a married woman Mary Alice," she rolled her eyes again. "So, if she gets the handcuffs what do I get" she whispered and laughed loudly. "Sorry, I just noticed how hard others are trying to hear what we're saying."

I turned around to see Jessica actively _not listening_, meaning: she was sitting as far right as she could while loudly tick tacking on her keyboard. Oddly enough there was nothing on her screen but solitaire when we walked by a second ago. It's one of the reasons she kept getting written up. It doesn't look very professional when patients and doctors go back and forth and there is always a solitaire game up. I mean really? Could she _pretend_ to work? Hell, I know Angela writes fan fiction while she's at work but at least it _looks_ like she's working. Good grief!

"Angela, I just wanted to introduce you to Rosalie, she's our new pharmaceutical representative. You two might be seeing a lot of each other."

"Angela."

"Rosalie, nice to meet you."

"Likewise," Rosalie glanced behind us, leaned in and whispered. "Do you guys ever go out for a girls night?"

"Rosalie, I think that is an excellent suggestion." I had to restrain a squeal. I looked to Angela and back to Rosalie. Hell yeah, girls night!

A/N: Lyrics to 'Ding Dong the Witch is Dead' are by E.Y. Harburg. No copyright infringement intended.

Yes, I know what some people think. Wow these characters are bitchy, yes, yes they are but are all your thoughts sweet and kind when you're at work. Mine aren't!

Review if you'd like.


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